It was not until someone handed me Harville Hendrix’s book, Keeping the Love You Find, did I finally understand my role in the dysfunctional. Harville Hendrix Ph.D. and his wife, Helen LaKelly Hunt, Ph.D. created Imago Harville: We wrote Keeping The Love You Find to address that. Keeping the Love You Find. By Harville Hendrix, Ph.D., ISBN 5 star must reading. [The following is what I highlighted during my read of this.

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Keeping the Love You Find!

Romantic love is not at all what it appears to be. When the Exploration phase is mishandled, children tend either to distance themselves from their parents or to become ambivalent. The fallout in relationships of the effects of our sex-negative, pleasure-negative culture would fill another book.

If you practice this exercise daily … you will experience kove deepening peace inside you. I doubt the rest of this book will have any clear research and statistics on why singles believe they are single.

Keeping the Love You Find is about preventing them. In the last chapter, unfortunately, you have to utilize all of the exercises and bring them together. Just a moment while we sign you in to your Goodreads account.

Since an interpretation is what you understand or what you think rather than what your partner meant, it often results in conflict and judgment. Your dream of finding a partner is a natural and normal human instinct and your dream is perfectly achievable. This book took me a very long time to complete.

You must surrender to the process, and have faith that your efforts will move you toward wholeness. Resolution, therefore, requires first becoming aware of how men and women differ biologically and psychologically, and then seeing how these differences are culturally magnified and distorted.


Keeping the Love You Find! The damage comes as the result of the method, and the ideology that informs it. This book does what it says.

I absolutely loved this henrdix. We are afraid of having our long unmet needs—those needs we learned to deny or disparage—finally satisfied. It is narrow-minded provincialism. While you are an addict, the only partner you will find will be codependent. Having or expressing needs; being excluded; parental partner rejection. Transcending cultural stereotypes to experience our whole selves moves us toward androgyny. The partners in a conscious relationship learn to own their negative traits their Denied Selves instead of projecting them harvillle and provoking them in their partners.

Those qualities end up annoying us and a power struggle ensues. This book was really helpful and made a lot of sense.

I am safe if I hold on to you. Being invisible, self-assertion, loss of parental partner love. How do we reclaim our lost parts, the good and the bad, and put ourselves back together? He outlines the stages of childhood development and their potential wounds, the ways we reject, deny, and lose aspects of ourselves, the unconscious choice of our partners and inevitable progression of our relationships based on these factors. No healing is possible until the truth is out in the open. Sounds like he’s really unhappy and jealous of the single life so he felt the need to write a book about how we are all bad singles.

On top of our fear, we are hampered by lack of partnership and intimacy skills. Beliefs and behavior are more rigid. The psyche is committed to its own completion. You must be willing to grow and change and commit yourself first and foremost to healing your partner. Oct 17, Kathryn rated it really liked it Shelves: Growing Pains Uncovering the Wounds of Childhood. We recapture our sexuality … through becoming conscious and transcultural. The industrial revolution, when fathers for the first time left home to work in factories while mothers stayed at home, powerfully defined gender roles.


Such love does not give birth to relationships. No person is ever whole. We hate ourselves for having needs that we were told were excessive or inappropriate, and for having traits that were hated by our caretakers. Within our quest to unstuck ourselves, we are constantly attracted to individuals who will help perpetuate that stage of childhood and development in the hopes that this time we can actually overcome it.

Past Member 7 years ago. The Journey to Consciousness. It feels exciting, and slightly terrifying!

Keeping the Love you Find – Imago Public Site

Diah Lestari 7 years ago. Simple, frivolous, sensual pleasures make us feel alive, and they are often sorely lacking in our busy, dutiful lives. Henxrix of the best books I’ve ever purchased!

In a self-protective move to avoid being absorbed, his boundaries become closed and rigid. I found it interesting. Learn new skills and to change negative, unproductive behavior. I can’t believe he would even start the book off with such utte I haven’t read past page